J. Timothy King’s Blog

Why Geeks Should Care About Fashion

As a thirty-something male software engineer, one of the best things about looking for a new job is that I get to go shopping for interview clothes. And that’s what I did this weekend.

If you’ve not appreciated the joy of shopping for interview clothes, you’re missing out. And if you think that this joy is just for women… Well, you unfortunately may be right. Women have so many more clothing options. Not only can they wear anything a man can wear, they get to wear skirts, capris, dresses, and even stirrup pants. (But please, ladies, don’t do that.) And accessories! As a man, I can wear a ring and watch. If I want to be bad, I can wear a crucifix around my neck, or maybe a stud earring. If I want to be formal, I can wear a tie. But the girls get to play with jewelry, scarves, handbags, shoes, and just about everything else. And women can get away with colors and patterns that would just make us guys look gay. Yes, women get to have all the fun and creativity.

For many years I cared nothing about how I dressed. I had T-shirts, threadbare, full of holes, sometimes ripped under the armpit where I had outgrown them. I wore them to work, along with my ripped jeans. I hated clothes shopping, which was just as well, because I didn’t care what I wore. I worked for the same laid-back employer for 14 years, and during that time I rarely upgraded my wardrobe. A software developer and musician, I hated formality and hated to be put in a box and told what to do. And I’m still that way. My creativity is one of my greatest strengths. I love breaking the rules, stepping out of the box, doing my own thing for the betterment of mankind. But back then, I didn’t see any use for nice clothes except as a way to conform.

Then I got laid off. And I needed to go on job interviews. And suddenly it was important to look good. And I didn’t know the first thing about the subject.

One day, I was watching the Learning Channel, and I discovered a relatively new show, called What Not to Wear. I watched a few episodes, and I discovered something that surprised me that shouldn’t have. Fashion requires creativity, and choosing clothes requires engineering skills. What makes you look tall, or thin, or muscular? The answer is not arbitrary. It’s your clothes, and choosing clothes is an exercise in bringing out your strengths and managing your weaknesses. You can have an average body, but with the right clothes, you can make an impression that lasts. Or you can have a killer body, and with the right clothes, you can look like a potato.

But there was something else I noticed on What Not to Wear, and something I noticed in myself later. When someone wears dumpy clothes, he behaves like a dork. When someone wears good-fitting clothes that bring out his best, he behaves like a leader. Just changing your wardrobe will change your personality. (If you doubt it, I suggest you try it.) And as a creative type, one thing that gives me great joy is to go into a clothing store, identify some item that I wouldn’t be caught dead in, and putting it on. New colors, new patterns, new prints. It’s a new way to break out of the box.

Okay, there are limits. I refuse even to acknowledge those loose-fitting jeans that look like daddy’s clothes. But that’s because they hide a lot more than illicit weapons. They also hide your best features. Even if you look great under there, they make it look like you have something to hide, like you’re fat and flabby. And that’s how people will perceive you. When it comes to looking good, you can’t take the Fifth.

Leaving Normal

Episode 4 of the TV show Roswell closes with a monologue, a voice-over:

The tough thing about following your heart is what people forget to mention, that sometimes your heart takes you to places you shouldn’t be, places that are as scary as they are exciting and as dangerous as they are alluring, and sometimes your heart takes you to places that can never lead to a happy ending. And that’s not even the difficult part. The difficult part is when you follow your heart, you leave normal, you go into the unknown. And once you do, you can never go back.

Of course, Liz in that episode was not talking about her career. She was talking about a teenage hormone-induced mad crush. And she and Max did go back, in the next episode and the episode after that, through the next season and the season after that. They dragged out that conflict until it was so thin a spider couldn’t use it. That’s what I get for watching a teen soap opera. It was one of the most painful storylines I’ve ever witnessed.

So what does this have to do with me? I want to leave full-time employment. We say having a job is selling your time. But that’s not true. Employment is much worse. Having a job is selling your soul. Your boss owns you. As an employee, you have a fiduciary relationship with your employer. What you do reflects directly on him, because you are part of him. As a salaried professional, you’re expected to work as many hours as possible, to do whatever it takes to satisfy your boss’s demands. Yes, if you’re a traitor like me, you can set limits on this relationship. But that does not endear you to the powers that be. It’s a choice with consequences.

I’m taking the quickest and fastest way I know out of slavery. Instead of selling my soul, I would like to sell my time. I want to pick up contract work. Unfortunately, it’s been some time since I went on a serious interview, some of my shirts are beginning to fray, and my jacket doesn’t quite fit anymore. And my favorite shirt is just plain wearing out. So Sunday I went to JCPenny, and took advantage of their sale. (For just a few hours, 30% off everything in the store.) I bought a new suit, three new shirts, and three new ties. (The ties were “buy 2 get one free.”) And I made sure there were plenty of mix-and-match possibilities with my existing wardrobe.

You may think that contracting would be just as bad as employment. But I’ve done some of each, and I don’t expect it to be. Consider what a successful contractor does:

• He provides a service.
• He negotiates a price.
• He markets himself.
• He maintains relationships with multiple clients.

… all thing you do to run a business. In fact, a number of Steve Pavlina’s 10 Reasons You Should Never Get a Job do not apply to contracting. They apply to employment, but not to contracting, at least not if you’re doing it right. For most people, contracting is a stepping stone to full-time employment. For me, it’s a stepping stone away from full-time employment.

And that leads me to the next blog post I’d like to write, “Can Contracting Be More Stable Than Full-time Employment?”